.:Tuesday.27th of April.into the fourth week of easter:.period.

Today was a really reflective day, in a sense. The events of this day made me reflect and think about the things around me, the things that matter to me and also about the things that really do not matter to me. Somehow or rather, I felt that today’s GP session made me see things in a rather clearer light or perhaps it helped me understand certain concepts and things that I could not actually see in our society.

We were talking or should I say discussing about the values of our society (Singapore). There were many things that made me wonder. From the different presentations from the different groups, each group gave different articles/materials taken from Singaporean produced publications e.g. from magazines like 8 days, Cohesion – by North West CDC, Spotlight brochures, articles on smart chips, articles on how we should increase the quality of beauty pageant participants by increasing the incentive, making the prize money larger, so more talented people would want to join the event, etc.

I will not dwell into the aspects of this lesson now as I’m really tired now. All I want to put down is whatever I reflected on the way home today..

With many things looming over my head or should I say shoulders, e.g. like the SATS which is coming on the 8th of May, Chinese AO’ Level on the 31st of May, a lot of things are worrying me now. That includes my family stuff, etc.

Sometimes I wonder what Life brings for me, what does God want me to do in life? Many times I ask myself these questions, many a times I wonder about the answer and many a times, in the haze of all the stuff that’s going around me, I forget all my own formulated answers and become all depressed again. I may not look too depressed to anyone coz’ I don’t show it. I only like to stay in the toilet and wonder and wonder and wonder and on it goes. Sometimes when I get angry or sad or whatever, I just put a smile on my face. It’s been getting torturous, but I enjoy doing it coz’ when you do it, it just warms you up and makes you forget about all your miseries. But when your miseries get too heavy and your burdens become mountains, and when your going gets tough, you somehow seem to forget smiling. I hope I will NEVER forget to smile. Some people say money makes the world go round, but I would like to say its not money, it’s the acts that you do for another person and that’s what counts.

My patron saint, St. Therese of Liseux said, I can do nothing, but just to show my love and care in very simple ways .. or something to that extent. (you can read about her in one of my previous entries) Perhaps that’s my calling. Kindness in simple ways.

Going back to the point of GP today, I just remembered that we did an article on kindness, written by a Maria Lau, saying something like our competitive world doesn’t give any opportunities for us to show empathy. I think whatever she said was Wrong! In what way do we not show kindness? I won’t bring up the point about how much Singaporeans give to charities, as I feel too much has already been dealt with by many people. I still strongly feel that showing empathy can be done in SMALL ways. Even in our competitive society of which I’m a part and of course, I’m sure you too play a part, we still try to help people in every single way possible. SMALL words/actions can speak LOUDLY to a person. Small and simple deeds, by say offering your help to help your friend hold her stuff when her hands are full and she needs to do something, offering whatever little bit you have for the betterment of others. I wouldn’t mind giving up my beloved fisherman’s friend lozenges to my friends in class, if it helps them keep awake and be better able to listen to the teacher, why NOT? Its just a small act, giving and wanting nothing back in return. That’s part of LIFE.  to me perhaps. But again, how many are willing to do it? Giving your time to LISTEN to the problems of a friend, maybe she just needs to air her feelings, her emotions would help a person go a long long way. You learn more about why people are feeling this way, you reap the rewards of such an act. In the end, what you get is a better understanding of yourself as a person TOWARDS others and also how other people might feel or react to any situation, be it a quarrel with their boyfriends/girlfriends, a scuffle with his/her sibling, a death of close friends, a happy end to something wrong in their lives, In the end, you get to see things from a different point of view, from a different point of thought, from a different mind, and thus the more you listen, the more you might be able to help the other party. You get a different view about the way people in society think and feel. The more you see, the more you hear, the more you experience, and when you do all that, and have gained the knowledge, wouldn’t you want to share it with others. But writing that, I feel as if I’m assuming that everyone is thinking like me. (STILL, it is just some of my ideas and notions about how to justify that everyone is capable of a little kindness in our society. A smile won’t hurt. That’s what I learnt.)

Next, my GP Tutor brought up another topic, there was this essay topic years back regarding something like “Michael Jackson is paid far more than nurses…” or something like that. I’ll post my thoughts about it sometime soon. Anyway what do you think about it? Perhaps you could all just give some small comments in the tag board if you ever come by this blog…

Hahaz. I would have probably bored you with too many of my thoughts … actually I reflected a little more and have more things to say but really I’m tired! And I guess you all are too.. (=P after reading this) ..=)

God Bless you all Folks!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us those who have recoursed to thee.